Nothing new

Hey guys,

It is a wonder that I haven’t died of boredom yet. I am sooooooo bored. I do not know what to do. I cannot search for a job because I do not know when (and if) I have to leave for the US. Oh, by the way, I have a new suggestion from a Swiss family from Boston with whom I have skyped yesterday. It was awkward and I doubt that they will pick me as their new AuPair. I do not believe that my AuPair year will happen so I am searching for an idea what subject I could study but it either sounds boring or has no future potential. That is so frustrating!

Moreover, I am really down, nothing makes fun anymore (not even reading) and I wish I could sleep the whole day. I thought being finish with school feels better. I wish I could be back at school! (I have never imagined saying this, oh god, it is worse than I thought).

I hope you feel better and have more fun.

Becca

Math

I survived my oral math exam!!! Yeah! But my math teacher picked the three two-quarters I was not good, he just did not made a task about the topics in the two quarters I had 10 points (B-). Dumbass! It wasn’t even necessary that he uses the topics of three two quarters, of two two-quarters would have been enough. I saw the tasks and I did not know what to do. In the end, I solved all seven tasks, somehow. For most of them the result seemed wrong. First I had to tell two characteristics why the graph shows the cup from the pic and I had to calculate the maximal diameter. The graph given was shown from x=0 to x=8 and at 8 it had the biggest diameter (I knew it because of the picture given) so I just plugged in the 8 for the x in the function. 

Second, I had to draw a circle with the given centre and the givenvents intersection with the graph. Fortunately I brought my spring bow. So I delineated it into the coordinate system. Because of the spring bow and the given points I knew the radius and I was able to set up the equation for the circle. 

Next, I had to describe how I can calculate the radius exactly.

Then I had to check if the condition f(3)<0,25 is correct so I had to set up the derivation and insert 3 for x. 

The next one consisted of the calculating method and I had to explain what is happening in each step (it was about the volume of revolution)

Then I had to draw a tree diagram about twenty cappuccinos, 14 of them with, 6 without cocoa. From the 14 with cocoa the judges marked them as good with a 70% probability but the ones without only with a probability of 55% and calculate the probability for a cappuccino regardless if it was with or without cocoa to be marked as good. 

Last I had to calculate the probability for three good cappuccinos of five chosen cappuccinos from all the twenty cappuccinos. 

After presentating my teacher showed me that some results (the ones I was certain were correct) could not be right. Great! 

He just asked me some other questions, mainly if I could show them my calculating method. Sometimes the other math teacher said I explained it well but it is wrong what I could change to make it right – I DO NOT KNOW IF I WOULD HAVE I WOULD HAD DONE IT THIS WAY STRAIGHT AWAY! He asked me how a graph with a negative gradient looks like, what I could have done OTHERWISE to proof that the graph on the picture fits the cup (insert a point – WHICH ONE THERE WAS NONE GIVEN, demands)… I am not very interested into getting to know the result. 

I hope my explanation is not that difficult to understand, I cannot express my mathematical thoughts in German so English is even worse.

Overwhelmed 

Guys, 

Only 100 days until the football season begins!!!😍

So now to what I actually wanted to say: I just cannot do anything anymore, not physically but mentally. Tomorrow is the first of my two oral exams for my A-Levels, tomorrow’s is math. It does not feel like a part of my A-Levels. Maybe because I haven’t had school since 18 days or because there is no one I can talk about it with. I just do not take it seriously not even one day before. It might be as well because regardless of how many points I get (I only need one to pass my A-Levels) my average is shitty. So I can be very relaxed because the teachers tend to give at least one point although I am certain my math teacher hates me. He will probably take a topic for tomorrow’s exam in which I am very bad. Anyway, it’s math, I will be satisfied if I get at least five points everything above would be a dream. The problem is I just cannot remember everything of the last two years! Especially not in math! 

Furthermore, my cat is very ill. She has barely moved and eaten since Sunday and only drank a bit this morning. I was not sure but when I touched she felt like she has temperature . So I went with her to the vet – only one day before my important exam. And I was right, she has 40C temperature! So she got a vitamin cure, antibiotics and an infusion. We got protein and Vitamine food and a painkiller for at home. All in all it costed 100€. Wow, I am totally broke now, although I babysitted twice this weekend. 

In addition to that, the fact that no host family was interested in me for more than one week and that there were only 5 ones overall in more than 4 weeks burns me out. My friend who is visible for host families for two weeks now has as much family suggestions as I. That’s frustrating. I get already used to the idea to stay in Germany. Now that I am finally aware of what I want it does not work out. At least I do not have to blame myself for taking so long until I was finally activated I did everything as fast as I could, even if I had wanted it since day 1 I would not have been visible for the host families any longer. I think most host families already found an AuPair and I am too late. I am still sad about not getting chosen by the host family from Texas. Now I do not know what to do if I cannot do my year abroad! There is only one month left until my preffered departure date. Weird. 
Well, first I have to pass my A-Levels now and then I can worry about my year abroad. Maybe a new family suggestion would distract me tomorrow anyway.

Waiting

The waiting for new email kills me. I want to do this, I want to be an AuPair. My life is so boring I want to experience something, to go on an adventure! One year can be very long, my A-Levels were bad, maybe I should do the year again and I am a bit afraid to come back when my time in the US was awesome! But I have to leave, I cannot stand my family anymore. I know, at first I was afraid to get an Email and I think this ruined my possible match with the host family from Texas but I think this host family interview with the Texan family woke me up and made me realise I want this! I know, my mum is still against the idea but she asks everyday if a new family is interested. Now that I turned down the host family from California with whom I Skyped two days ago (I just did not feel comfortable but they answered that they feel similarly, dumbasses) I have no interested families again. That is very frustrating, especially if my friend who was approved to be seen by the host family three weeks later than I had already four suggestions and is in contact with a family who she really likes and who likes her back so they are probably going to match. AM I THIS BAD?! I want a family now so I can get the visa. This takes at least four weeks and I wanted to depart in July! I think now that I know what I  want the Au Pair thing is not going to happen because I won’t find a fitting host family…

P.S. Check out my new blog especially for my year abroad! 

Police interrogation

Hey there,

I am very busy with learning for my A-Levels lately but I try to have time for my Host family search as well.
My dream family from Texas rejected me unfortunately and I was very desperate until I got a new suggestion yesterday. I was sure that I will never find a good host family, maybe because I am too late or my application is total crap.

I wrote with the host dad of the newly suggested host family (from Chicago) and we arranged a Skype Interview for today. I was not very nervous because I thought it will be as casual as the one with the host mum from Texas last week. Think again! It was horrible ( and lasted even longer!) The host dad asked me a lot of questions, sometimes even very private ones like how my parents punished me or who I am closest to in my family and why. He wanted to know a lot of things (my hobbies, in detail, e.g. how often and what I cook, my driving behaviour, e.g. which car I drive and how often, if I had been in a foreign country alone, e.g. where I did my internship, how it was, how my exchange to England was, and so on. A ton of questions, I was afraid that it will never end. It was worse than every police interrogation I could imagine. Sometimes I had difficulties to express what I want to say but I think he understood me and even said my English is very good! At the end I was able to ask some questions and it seemed like he want to have perfect kids so they are constantly under pressure to improve. Moreover there were quite a few rules for the AuPair and he emphasised that the AuPair would be a worker with special treatment but a worker! In addition to this electronic devices like phones and tablets are not allowed there.

That is not the family I searched for so I just declined a second Skype interview, this time with the host mum.

Certain but disappointed 

Hi people, 

the Skype Interview and my situation at home let me see that I should and want to be an AuPair although I know that my mum will be sad about it. I was so hopeful aboutthefamily from Texas and I really imagined living there. I wrote their current AuPair but she didn’t answer me. I think this could be thereason they did not pick me. They might have thought that I am not interested in them because their AuPair has not got my email because it maybe got into her spam folder. I do not know. What I know was that I was very disappointed that they did not pick me as their AuPair. I really wanted it. This made me realize that I want to do a year abroad. Although I never truly believed they would pick me (I screwed up the Skype Interview, I asked not enough questions and talked too less all in all and maybe because they thought I never emailed their AuPair and I do not care enough – although I did). I haven’t heard of them for two days and when I saw that I got an email yesterday evening I knew that this would be a refusal email so I was afraid to open it. I was totally down yesterday and i maybe cried a bit. The only thing I could think about today was that they did not want me although I was the AuPair’s favorite. So I screwed it up by being me. Great. I never got am positive answer to any application I sent, regardless to whom or what. Both families who turned me down said that my application is great and I will easily find a host family. Haha, good joke. Three families wrote me in three weeks. I will never find a family until September. I know it sounds ridiculous because it seems like I want to take part in the AuPair Programme since Tuesday but you know I really wanted this a long time before and I just got uncertain because of school and my family.  

Eurovision Song Contest 2017

Hey, 

you know how much I love the ESC. I am always very excited about it, already weeks before. My family do not understand my fascination with this event. Although I love it so much I do not watch the semi-finals because I prefer to get surprised in the final what songs every country contributes this year. I listen to the songs which did not make it into the final after every semi-final. This year I accidentally listened to Sweden’s entry before the final. Damn. I had an earworm of it the whole time even though it was not that good. I started watching the ESC in my room on Saturday because my family did not want to watch it and I watched the new episode of Prison Break before, which luckily ended right before the Song Contest began. 

I already got my strawberries and Coke so I can fully enjoy the ESC without any interruption. Germany’s entry was not awesome but not that bad either. After three songs I noticed that my mum watches it too. So I got downstairs and we watched it together. I love to live tweet during the ESC and get to know what other people think of the Song and share my opinion. The best thing is that the actor Seamus Dever (famous for his role “Ryan” in Castle) watched and tweeted about it too – like last year. 

The time always flies by, so it did this year too. When all songs were over I was very disappointed because there was barely a good song although I have to say now that there are a few songs I really like after listening a few times to them.

The contest got opened by Israel. First I thought he is a really bad singer but since I listen to the Song the whole week I like it. 

I do not like Poland’s entry. I did not got that fiddler anyway. 

Belarus was even worse. Then jumping on stage seemed ridiculous and the vents, what for? 

Austria’s entry was average. He was a typical teen boy singer, nothing special. The song was okay.

Next was Armenia. The background dancers were weird. Although the Song was okay it did not create feelings.

The song of the Netherlands was good until the chorus even though it sounded a bit like a Christmas song performed by Pentatonix.

Then the best song of the evening came. I liked it then already but like I said before hearing it more often make me like it even more. MOLDOVA HAD THE BEST ENTRY THIS YEAR. The leg dance was crazy and I did not get the brides on stage but the Song, I love it!

Hungary’s song was the first one I really disliked.

The Italian entry was okay although I did not get the hype about it. If it has a message I do not get it because I cannot speak Italian. But the voice of the singer was different, I like it. 

Denmark was boring this year. 

Salvador Sobral – the winner of this year’s  – is a good singer but his song sounded like a dying cat. The song was so slumbrous. I do not get how this song could win. Is the majority deaf? People are you crazy?

Azerbaijan was not so bad, I mean I did not get why there were a ladder and a horse but the on stage performance was very minimalistic this general this year.

Croatia was bad. Does the singer has a split personality. This was not art but just rubbish. 

Australia was like Austria dedicated to all teen girls but I liked this one better than the Austrian one (Sorry). In fact it even is third best in my opinion this year. 

Greece had creepy background dancers too but the Song was good. 

The entry of Spain was okay although I think it did not deserve the last place. Okay it seemed like he can only say “Do it for your lova” in English but it was groovy. 

I cannot understand why I totally hated Norway’s entry at first because I already started living it during the recaps and in the end it became my second favorite this year. 

Great Britain’s singer was great bit the Song was terrible. I pleaded her to give up and leave.

Cyprus had a fine song as well although it still reminds me of an advertisement.

My mom loved Romania’s yodeling entry although I found it awful. 

Our entry was not that bad, I thought it would be in the middle field, I do not understand why Europe hates us! Thank Ireland, by the way! 😘

Ukraine was way better than last year but still not that good. 

Belgium always sends good entry, I just say Loic Nottet, I love Blanche’s voice and the Song was absolutely amazing. 

Sweden’s entry is really catchy and has so deep lyrics. 😉 But I think Robin is too narcissistic. 

The Bulgarian one was boring and with out any emotions.

The last one, France, was surprising but just average. 

My resume was then that there were “average songs, not one totally awesome, boring stage performances and crazy background dancers”. Now I have to say that the songs were not that bad as I thought at first. 

I think MOLDOVA should have won and not that awful song from Portugal.