Overwhelmed 

Guys, 

Only 100 days until the football season begins!!!😍

So now to what I actually wanted to say: I just cannot do anything anymore, not physically but mentally. Tomorrow is the first of my two oral exams for my A-Levels, tomorrow’s is math. It does not feel like a part of my A-Levels. Maybe because I haven’t had school since 18 days or because there is no one I can talk about it with. I just do not take it seriously not even one day before. It might be as well because regardless of how many points I get (I only need one to pass my A-Levels) my average is shitty. So I can be very relaxed because the teachers tend to give at least one point although I am certain my math teacher hates me. He will probably take a topic for tomorrow’s exam in which I am very bad. Anyway, it’s math, I will be satisfied if I get at least five points everything above would be a dream. The problem is I just cannot remember everything of the last two years! Especially not in math! 

Furthermore, my cat is very ill. She has barely moved and eaten since Sunday and only drank a bit this morning. I was not sure but when I touched she felt like she has temperature . So I went with her to the vet – only one day before my important exam. And I was right, she has 40C temperature! So she got a vitamin cure, antibiotics and an infusion. We got protein and Vitamine food and a painkiller for at home. All in all it costed 100€. Wow, I am totally broke now, although I babysitted twice this weekend. 

In addition to that, the fact that no host family was interested in me for more than one week and that there were only 5 ones overall in more than 4 weeks burns me out. My friend who is visible for host families for two weeks now has as much family suggestions as I. That’s frustrating. I get already used to the idea to stay in Germany. Now that I am finally aware of what I want it does not work out. At least I do not have to blame myself for taking so long until I was finally activated I did everything as fast as I could, even if I had wanted it since day 1 I would not have been visible for the host families any longer. I think most host families already found an AuPair and I am too late. I am still sad about not getting chosen by the host family from Texas. Now I do not know what to do if I cannot do my year abroad! There is only one month left until my preffered departure date. Weird. 
Well, first I have to pass my A-Levels now and then I can worry about my year abroad. Maybe a new family suggestion would distract me tomorrow anyway.

Waiting

The waiting for new email kills me. I want to do this, I want to be an AuPair. My life is so boring I want to experience something, to go on an adventure! One year can be very long, my A-Levels were bad, maybe I should do the year again and I am a bit afraid to come back when my time in the US was awesome! But I have to leave, I cannot stand my family anymore. I know, at first I was afraid to get an Email and I think this ruined my possible match with the host family from Texas but I think this host family interview with the Texan family woke me up and made me realise I want this! I know, my mum is still against the idea but she asks everyday if a new family is interested. Now that I turned down the host family from California with whom I Skyped two days ago (I just did not feel comfortable but they answered that they feel similarly, dumbasses) I have no interested families again. That is very frustrating, especially if my friend who was approved to be seen by the host family three weeks later than I had already four suggestions and is in contact with a family who she really likes and who likes her back so they are probably going to match. AM I THIS BAD?! I want a family now so I can get the visa. This takes at least four weeks and I wanted to depart in July! I think now that I know what I  want the Au Pair thing is not going to happen because I won’t find a fitting host family…

P.S. Check out my new blog especially for my year abroad! 

Police interrogation

Hey there,

I am very busy with learning for my A-Levels lately but I try to have time for my Host family search as well.
My dream family from Texas rejected me unfortunately and I was very desperate until I got a new suggestion yesterday. I was sure that I will never find a good host family, maybe because I am too late or my application is total crap.

I wrote with the host dad of the newly suggested host family (from Chicago) and we arranged a Skype Interview for today. I was not very nervous because I thought it will be as casual as the one with the host mum from Texas last week. Think again! It was horrible ( and lasted even longer!) The host dad asked me a lot of questions, sometimes even very private ones like how my parents punished me or who I am closest to in my family and why. He wanted to know a lot of things (my hobbies, in detail, e.g. how often and what I cook, my driving behaviour, e.g. which car I drive and how often, if I had been in a foreign country alone, e.g. where I did my internship, how it was, how my exchange to England was, and so on. A ton of questions, I was afraid that it will never end. It was worse than every police interrogation I could imagine. Sometimes I had difficulties to express what I want to say but I think he understood me and even said my English is very good! At the end I was able to ask some questions and it seemed like he want to have perfect kids so they are constantly under pressure to improve. Moreover there were quite a few rules for the AuPair and he emphasised that the AuPair would be a worker with special treatment but a worker! In addition to this electronic devices like phones and tablets are not allowed there.

That is not the family I searched for so I just declined a second Skype interview, this time with the host mum.

Certain but disappointed 

Hi people, 

the Skype Interview and my situation at home let me see that I should and want to be an AuPair although I know that my mum will be sad about it. I was so hopeful aboutthefamily from Texas and I really imagined living there. I wrote their current AuPair but she didn’t answer me. I think this could be thereason they did not pick me. They might have thought that I am not interested in them because their AuPair has not got my email because it maybe got into her spam folder. I do not know. What I know was that I was very disappointed that they did not pick me as their AuPair. I really wanted it. This made me realize that I want to do a year abroad. Although I never truly believed they would pick me (I screwed up the Skype Interview, I asked not enough questions and talked too less all in all and maybe because they thought I never emailed their AuPair and I do not care enough – although I did). I haven’t heard of them for two days and when I saw that I got an email yesterday evening I knew that this would be a refusal email so I was afraid to open it. I was totally down yesterday and i maybe cried a bit. The only thing I could think about today was that they did not want me although I was the AuPair’s favorite. So I screwed it up by being me. Great. I never got am positive answer to any application I sent, regardless to whom or what. Both families who turned me down said that my application is great and I will easily find a host family. Haha, good joke. Three families wrote me in three weeks. I will never find a family until September. I know it sounds ridiculous because it seems like I want to take part in the AuPair Programme since Tuesday but you know I really wanted this a long time before and I just got uncertain because of school and my family.  

Skype Interview

Hey guys,

I had my first Skype Interview yesterday. It was with the host mum from Texas. I was not very nervous because I was sure that I would not want to pick the family so I thought of the Interview as a new experience. We were to skype at 3pm, 8am her time. Okay, a few minutes before I was very nervous and thought about quitting our meeting. Luckily, I didn’t. She was so nice and cute. First, she introduced herself and said she will talk about her children and then I should talk about myself and in the ensvideo we would answer each other’s questions so our talk is not tensed but like the one of two friends. She told me a lot about her three children, I knew the most of it already but I was happy about her talking the whole time. Then I told her something about school, my babysitting duties, my family and my hobbies. After that she asked if I have any questions, I hadn’t. I already asked some via Email. So she just started talking about her everyday life and how the kids behave, that the AuPair would be a family member and what would be expected of the AuPair. Thank God, I remembered two questions so I seemed a bit interested although I wrote everything down about the families beforehand and a few questions I could ask but nothing seemed appropriate during our talk. She even told me about their current AuPair and that she helps picking a new AuPair. She showed me that their AuPair marked me as her favorite. Yes! The interview took 22 minutes but it seemed much shorter. I really fell in love with the family! I could imagine living there. I think if the family would want me I would say yes. Well I got the e-mail address of the current AuPair and I wrote her so I am really excited what she will answer. 

Becca

That was fast! 

Hey there,

new news from the AuPair front. I got an Email from a new Host family on Friday. I replied approximately 16 hours later. The kids are soooo cute! A girl (9) and a boy (6). The family seems very sporty and active. They picked me probably because of my very active video which does not mirror my real life, I just needed scenes with children whuchand was easiest by jumping trampoline and playing soccer and I wanted to show that I do sports sometimes with the running. It is only now that I noticed that I seen like a sports fanatic in the video. Great. I haven’t got an answer on my Email yet. That is not so bad I mean now I can enjoy my last week of school without being nervous about my interview and I AM STILL NOT SURE IF I WANT TO DO THIS. I mean it is very selfish. My mum relies on me and if I leave she is alone with my dad and my sis with whom she has a lot of fights. 

Update: The family wrote me tonight. I cannot open it. My motto: If I do not know it it isn’t there. Haha, naïve. 

No match

Hey guys! 

I turned down the offer of the host family from Atlanta. I checked out their site on the AuPair website. The e-mail sounded great but when I read the letter to the future AuPair I was not certain that this is the family I want. The kids have ADHD and have to take pills and are often naughty but “it is very funny and difficult not to laugh about it” What? Totally funny when they do what they want. Moreover, I really do not want the parents working from home. I would always feel watched. Moreover, there not only lived the parents with its two children but all grandparents too. The biggest problem was that I would have have to take my holidays when they were in summer holidays only a few weeks after I would have arrived. I do not have money then. The good things would have been that I would have to work weekdays often so I had free on weekends most of the time. Moreover, Atlanta is cool although I would prefer the West Coast. The family looks nice too and has a lot of workers so I would not have much to do. But I was wondering why they even need an AuPair with all this people living there… Maybe I am too picky or my subconscious wants to tell me that deep inside me I do not want to go to the US… 

Becca