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Hey guys,
I finally back. My adventure in the US continues. I had interesting last few months, where I put my finger in an immersion blender, had my first car accident, still have zero friends, have been to five different states, celebrated my first christmas and new years without my family, had an American thanksgiving, went to New York City to admire the christmas decorations, am going to an US-college, had a sleepover at a museum, watched the SuperBowl in the US (my host familiy’s favorite team won, my hostdad and my oldest host kid even flew to Minneapolis),  was skiing the first time after seven years, was snowtubing, made harbor cruise, baked a lot and am still not missing home.

So first of all, my finger is fine, it was on Patriot’s day and the boys had no school so in the afternoon we decided to make three different dishes, we, well more I finished the dessert, Banana split pie and we moved on to the next thing, carrot chickpea snacks. My oldest one does not like chickpeas so after succesfully mashing the chickpeas we decided to mash black beans. Black beans are much more solid than chickpeas so I decided to use the immersion blender to shred it. It worked out well, I was afraid the boys would get hurt so I told them to stay back and did it myself. After unplugging it i wanted to clean it, I even had to think about my mum and if it would be one of her stories I would cut off my finger now. Suddenly the immersion blender started and my finger was caught inside the blade. I was so shocked I just cried out once and told the boys to stay away. It started bleeding heavily right away and i tried to remove the blade from my finger. That was the moment I saw I did not unplugg the immersion blender but the mixer next to it. Damn!!! It hurted so bad and I clutched my finger and squeezed it as hard as i could to make it numb and stop the bleeding. I rushed to the bathroom to let cold water run over it. It was bleeding so much I bleed like a pig and left stains everywhere regardless of the mess I made when my finger was caught in the blender, I threw everything sitting on the counter down on the floor. To avoid the boys seeing me crying I send them away to have screentime while I panicked and started crying and wished my mum would be here because she knows what to do. So I paced through the house, crying, unable to watch how much of my finger I had cut off, hoping my host mum would come home. Unfortunately it was just after 3 and she would not be home for the next three hours. I was weighing the pros and cons of calling 911. I was worried about the boys, what would happen with them, what about my insurance etc, so I decided I had to look at it and see how bad it was but I just couldnt because I was so afraid to see how bad it really was because I knew my finger was still there but was it hanging at a string? After wandering through the house for 70 minutes I decided to look at it. I was a little bit dissapointed that the boys never looked for me but it was probably better. So when I lessened the pressure around my finger it started bleeding profusely again. I let water running over it now without my other hand protecting it so it washed up the fresh blood and i could finally see it, it was actually better than i imagined, I had cut it right where the finger nail started and even the finger nail was cut in half until the middle of the nail. I was just worried because it did not stop bleeding. I called my mum but she did not pick up so I called my sister, guys, I was desperate, I had to talk to someone! She was no big help because she was so engaged in her computer game. Well I just told her everything anyway and she told me mum was working. Because she did not listen anyways our call ended after 10 minutes and I started cleaning up the kitchen. I hoped I could clean up most of it before my host parents would come home, it was already a little after five. But I was not lucky this day, my host mum came approx. 5 minutes after I had started cleaning up, she said it looks like we were very busy and when she saw the blood I told her what has happended  but that I was fine. She asked if i would have to go to the hospital but I said no. So she continued working from home and I had to clean up the kitchen but I ended up talking to my mum because I had wrote her some messages which were stuff like ‘Do not worry, I did not die’ because I was frustrated when I haven’t been able to reach her. She was shocked and wanted to know everything in detail and i had to send her tons of pictures. She was worried but I tried to calm her down. When my host dad came home he was very worried and wanted to see it right away but we were about to have dinner so I did not want to ruin that and my host mum said I am old enough he does not need to check on me. Thanks! I was actually really relieved to show it to someone who was not thousands of miles away. After dinner i showed it to him and he said it is sketchy and I should decide if I wanna go to the ER he would drive me there. He has been there often because he had a lot of injuries already. But I refused his offer. My host mum gave me an antibiotic ointment which I applied and put an band aid on.
Now my finger is healed without seeing an doctor. My finger tip is numb and the part where the cut is is very sensitive, even the slightest touches hurt. My fingernail is split and started to protrude so I had to cut off these part and now I have a hole in my nail.

I am telling you more about the other events the next time.

What I wanted to write about was home. I got a 5 year journal at the beginning of the year, where you have to answer a question every day and they repeat every year for five years. It currently asked me what home is and I wrote that I refer to my living place in Germany as home as well as to my host parents house. At first I tried to not refer to the house in the US as home when I talked to my mum but that is ridicioulus, I was searching for a second family, although I doubt I found it. Today I realised I have no real home where I am feeling 100% comfortable. Alone the thought of returning to Germany scares me. Everything seems so small, boring and predetermined while I am free here. I can’t return, but should I extend? It is not as good as I imagined and most of the times it is awkward with my host parents. This question stressed me out so much, I knew already after a few weeks I would extend for nine more months but with the same family? The area is great, I kind of like the boys, they are so cute and well mannered and if I would leave them for another family I would definitly throw away even the slightest chance to see them as a second family and stay in contact. But maybe I would find a better family somewhere else! Ahhhhh! So I recently decided to wait what they would do, if they ask me to stay longer I would although I am not so sure, looking at my work, I wouldnt ask me… Well, to make it even harder, my mum suggested I should go to New Zealand as an Au Pair after my year here. I have no idea how she came up with this idea. She always tells me how much she misses me and she can’t wait until I come home and then she wants me to leave again? Why? She said I should think about it. I already did some research. I am not sure. I kind of like the idea but it feels like I will never accomplish something. I will start studying 3 years after graduation. My fellow students will be 3 years younger than me! I kind of like the thought to extend for 6 months AND go to New Zealand but my mum will hate this idea but I should make my own decisions! I mean it was her idea with New Zealand! But I do not want to break my mum’s heart! Oh man, what should I do? Moreover, I miss my cat Frau Schröder so much (she is actually the only living being I miss) and what would it do to her if I would leave her again? I would miss 2 years of her life!

Do not get me wrong, I love Germany. Staying in the US made me even realise how much! I just can’t bear the thought of returning home to my family in my small home town with no clue what to do in my future. I would not like to stay here permanently, Germany is too cool but I living somewhere else. When I don’t do it know I never will! And it is always just for a short amount of time and not for forever.

Btw, I am so proud of Germany leading the Olympic medal table. I even betted with my host dad that Germany would get more gold medals than the US, we did it already 2006 and 2010. Come on Germany!

das-deutsche-olympia-team-steht-im-aktuellen-medaillenspiegel-auf-dem-ersten-platz-

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New Years

Hey there,

you know that I get nostalgic on New Years Eve every year.

My day is not over yet, remember me being at the American East Coast.

My day is not better than the last years, I had to ski for 6 hours, my first time after the first time ever six years ago. I am very proud of myself, my instructor said I was very good and we even went down slopes he usually hits with his students after a few days skiing and I fell just once! He praised me the whole time how good I am. After a time I couldn’t take it serious anymore. After my fall I was not motivated anymore and scared to fall again. Fortunately I was almost done anyway. My host dad picked me up later and we walked back to the hotel. It was so cold! -18 C! I couldn’t feel my toes and fingers anymore. Tomorrow I have to ski with my host family, I hope i can them convince them to leave me behind like they do all the time anyway.

When we came back my host kids and mum went to the hot tub so I could shower. When they came back I had to supervise the boys shower. Then we went to friends of my host parents. Here we stay until next year. Because I felt like disturbing the adults I spent time with the kids watching Rise of the Guardians and The croods until it was dinner time: buffet with Asparagus, Rips, Salmon, mushrooms, potatoes, salad, cauliflower and a lot of snacks. After that I stayed with the adults because I thought it would be weird if I just spend time with the kids but in the end it was weird to be with the adults, they talked about boats and other stuff I have no knowledge about… Right now there singing karaoke and i fell like I am in the wrong place. Maybe I should not be here. Right now I wish i would be at home. They have January already. See you next year.

This year was fine, I enjoy my stay except for the monthly tragic incidents.

We will see where I am today in a year!

Could we erase that please?

Hey!

Yesterday was awful. First, okay there was the first football game of the season but the Pats lost! Probably because Julian Edelman is injured… (Okay probably not but let me believe it please). 

I got my shifts for working on the IAA in Frankfurt yesterday. I thought I would work everyday but in the end I only work five days! Great, I almost earn nothing. But first of all, I have a class how to behave and what to do then today to which I am on my way right now. It takes seven hours, seven hours of my precious Saturday! The worst is that I have to go to a briefing tomorrow regarding my first shift on Monday. I work for the customer only on Monday and have to spend my Sunday there exactly like the other ones who are working there the whole two weeks, I mean I have to travel there every time and pay my ticket! It would not be so bad if I had to work there all 5 days but just for this one time is a waste of my time and the briefing takes place during the first football game on Sunday! Argh! My mum says I should not go but then I cannot work on Monday and have only four days left. I do not know what to do!

Xoxox Becca

Football😍🏈

Hi there!

today the Football season finally starts! I am so excited and totally looking forward to it. I am already planning how I am going to watch it, the snacks, the place, etc. Just a few hours to go and then I am watching my new home team: the New England Patriots!❤ Unfortunately Julian Edelman is hurt and cannot play this season (and I have him in my Fantasy team😭). Moreover, I am disappointed in the Vikings, they cut Moritz Böhringer!😤 Hopefully the Vikings won’t make it into the playoffs and the Patriots will participate in the Super Bowl (at least). 😈

Birthdays

Hey,

I really do not like August. Okay, it’s summer and I like the warm and sunny weather where one can sit outside in the sun drinking a cold drink and reading a great book (In my opinion one cannot read every book at every weather, I believe the weather has to match the atmosphere of the book, weird I know. A popular example is Twilight, I prefer to read it while it’s bad weather.) Okay, I got distracted. What I wanted to tell you is that I really hate August because it’s my birthday month. I despise my birthday. It’s my birthday this week and I can’t wait for it to be over. There are barely any things I abhor more than having birthday. The thing is it is kinda New Years Eve (the ones of you who follow me for a longer time now know how much I dislike it). Everyone says nice things and treats you especially kindly just because it’s your birthday. You have to be lovely too because it is your birthday you are supposed to be happy and charming to your guests, you are not allowed to be mad. Moreover, you are the center of attention, you have to decide which food for dinner and what movie to watch although the other 364 (365) days no one cares about your opinion. The presents do not make it better. You are exspected to like them and even if I like them they do not compensate the stress. I prefer not having birthday and that’s probably the reason I haven’t thrown a party the past years. My plan for tomorrow is to go for a run in the morning and spend the rest of the day by reading in the sun  (it is said to be sunny and warm) preferably “Voyager” by Diana Gabaldon. It will be a very calm day and I exspect no surprises, I get 19, that is nothing special, it is just frustrating because I will get 20 next year and I have always considered 20 as old. *Sigh*

I am on the road now because I want to sign the contract for working as a hostess finally so I have to bake the cake for tomorrow in the evening. I know it is a bit depressing when the birthday girl has to bake her cake herself. This will be the second cake I baked this week, I guess I bake a lot when I am bored. It is going to be an Amarula cheesecake after I already made an Amarula chocolate chip cake (Now that the Amarula bottle is open I have to get it empty in a couple of days and lacking of friends to drink it with – drinking it alone is so sad and full of calories – I have to use it for baking.

Oh and for the German football fans: This Sunday there is a day almost totally dedicated to American Football on ProSiebenMaxx where they even show one preseason game (I would have almost missed it so I want to draw you attention to it!) 

Impatient

Only 19 days until the new American Football regular season starts!😍🎉 I am so excited! The first game I could watch in the US is one of the 7pm games on October 22 (week 7) but somehow I doubt my host family is an American Football fan – unfortunately. Maybe I get to know an other AuPair who likes Football as much as I do and ideally lives in Massachusetts too! I got my payment information for the AuPair programme and insurance fee and my mum still asks everyday if I am sure I want to do it. I am. I am really looking forward to it. It is not even a problem that I have to fly one day earlier than planned because of the AAA driver’s course! Although I start to doubt if I have matched with the right family… 

Today, is gonna be the day…

Where the Pats will win their fifth Super Bowl!🎉😍🏈🏆 #Sorrynotsorry The Pats are my second favorite team after the Vikings. I am looking forward to the Super Bowl since a few weeks. Because of this I dedicated the whole day to it. You probably know that the Super Bowl starts at 22:55 pm German time which means I have to stay up very late although I have school tomorrow. Because of this I tried to sleep as long as possible today. Last year I fell asleep before the first half was over. 😩 To prevent that happening this year as well I want to take a nap in the afternoon, too. The second reason for it is that I do not want to be that tired in school tomorrow. So, I got up at 11:30am and ate a little breakfast, baked a cake as fast as I could. After this I went showering and now I am supposed to learn for my A-Level English exam but I cannot stop watching Football videos or read articles about the Super Bowl. I am curious about the Half time show by Lady Gaga. Unfortunately I missed the one by Coldplay, one of my favorite bands, last year! I am going to watch the PreSuperBowl show airing on ProSiebenMaxx at 20:15pm. Last year I tried to watch it in the live stream but our internet was too slow for it (yeah I had not had the programme at TV) but this year I have the programme and can watch it on TV. I cannot wait! I already have all the snacks and drinks I need for later. 

I think the Pats will win by a large margin. What do you think? 

P.S. My aunt asked how my AuPair application is going. I confessed that I have it up because I have not enough hours but she said that is a chance of a lifetime and I should do it. Deep inside I would love to do it but I am scared. It is such a long time! Although I dreamed the whole time that I will watch a NFL game live next year. I still do not know what to do.